Friendships and the truth inside of ourselves

Something that I think about lately:

Lately----it seems theres lot of posts on friendship and true friendships and things going around on facebook.
Everyone will go through something at one point or another in life. Maybe theyre upset, or angry. Maybe theyve been hurt or wronged. For me, I've realized---we are social folk. Most of humanity needs a point of socialism in their life. Some how and some way. Some by marraige, others by friendship, some being blessed with the ability to have both a great relationship with their spouse and great friendships chosen and annointed by our wonderful Father above.

For me, it meant changes in my life. Changes that have occured over years of periods of times, and some really stupid dumb times that I cant believe I allowed to happen. Those changes took place. Then following that were others. I looked up and said? But alas it had to happen. There comes a time in life, when we must let go. We can't cry because others are not there for us when we've been there for them. Yet we are only human.

We love the freindships others have, we may even wish we had that for ourselves. I used to wish and it would make me so sad. Then I realized thats not from Him. Sadness and pain is not soething He would wish upon me. Thats satan. when I realized this---I changed. :) This was God's way of molding me to be more in His image and to be more like Christ and less like me.
Because I pray on it, because I desire it. Because I have to choose it, and when I choose it--He works with it.

See many people think that----"thats how i am if you dont like it tough thats how He made me." But the truth is, its not. He loves you unconditionally, but in my thoughts, if we hve ugliness in us, why would we want to continue or not admit to that? Why would we desire it and stand by it? or feel entitled? Satan. in all holds and smiles he grabs on to what he can.

If we stop and we truly pray and we seek out for the good in ourselves, to ask in CHrists name we seek inside of ourselves the things we cannot see, to show us--so that we can choose change---we are choosing to allow Christ to work inside of us from inside out. See, We are given CHOICE. The freedom of choice. If we dont open ourselves to Him---then how can He work in us? we MUST be open even to change. good change. Change in Him. Forget mankind and what mankind wants. I want what my Father wants.
So for friendships, sometimes, that means changes too.

Now....because of change, if I stay away from the ones who are stressful it doesnt mean i love them any less, it just means Ive distanced because perhaps---there is within a reason of my own. So I perfer my stressfree friends----who care enough about their lives to make changes the same as I do.

Some talk all the time about "being around ones who lift you up" but.....we can only lift so much. If you are going to carry the weight of the world on your shoulders, we can only do so much, ultimately the choice is yours. IF you have so much strife in your life, and you ask yourself why but you refuse to acknowledge your part---how can you see? You say "I am so good, I do this or that, Im so wonderful. I dont do this or that." --- But yet, you have strife, heartbreak----then were are you seeking? What are YOU allowing? What choices are you choosing? You beg for God in all His Glory to rescue you---but have you opened your heart to truly obeying and changing? Sometimes what WE want and what HE intends, are not the same thing.

When you keep carrying this---it affects others. We begin to own problems we don't want to. If we want to be around uplifting people who enjoy life, then we MUST become those people too. Its OKAY to have problems, but it is not okay to live them 24/7 because that is not a life. You may beg to differ, but honestly---I wouldn't want to be in your shoes. I draw a line at crying or being irritable or bitter because im trying to be the perfect friend or woman or wife or mother----there comes a time when I say LORD WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO. And it may take a few tries, eventually I get it right. IF I can. So can you.

Any excuses in your life--are our own. Any repeat cycles in our lives...are our own.
When we choose them and we choose to do them "our way" we prohibit His work in our lives.

Be the change in your own because ultimately, it begins with you. Just as mine begins with me.

Security comes from accepting what we lack. What we don't have. BEing satisfied with it, and waiting patiently on HIS timing. Because what we allow Him to remove, He will give back more. Obedience. Trust. Faith. Do you have it? I'm learning.

Even I am sad without friends. I am fortunate to have 2 elders (those who are older and wiser than myself) and trustworthy---to occasionally unload on, and I do mean OCCASSIONALY its a very rare occasion. But we cannot humanly carry evertything with us, even after unloading on Christ sometimes we just need to vent. WISE people understand this. Mere humans of this world, do not. They will spit it out and twist it around and it will come out.

I am everyones friend. What comes to me, stays with me, God has taught me this. I know nothing. I am eyes to listen. A wisdom to understanding. I'll be there in time of need---no matter who they are to me. A friend a foe. I know that when I am in need they say "oh ill be here" the truth is, Ive been there and needed them a thousand times----they were no where to be found--excuses in every path and every way. So I've learned to embrace what I dont have. To be secure in what I lack. Patience is a virtue. I have Christ. I can smile. I can say "satan get the behind" when he starts to try to stir up strife.

Who are you? Who do you want to be? I would love to do more----perhaps one day. But I am happy that I can count on ONE HAND the very few I would dare to call a friend. It doesnt mean I dont need the female companionship of just generalized company. We all do.

I too have been judged and rated---but for those who have judged me--it will go right back to them, unless and until they make ammends, and likewise for me. I sure do hope I've covered all my bases. My deep thoughts for this shall stop here. :) Goodnight blog readers.